COWS
Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps in the state of Washington, and they tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give them all a cow.

CONSTITUTION
They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq. Why don’t we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it’s worked for over 200 years and we’re not using it anymore.

TEN COMMANDMENTS
The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments in a Courthouse?
You cannot post “Thou Shalt Not Steal,” “Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery”
and “Thou Shall Not Lie” in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians…It creates a hostile work environment.

And Last but not least…..
George Carlin said it best about Martha Stewart ..
“Boy, I feel a lot safer now that she’s behind bars. O.J. Simpson and Kobe Bryant are still walking around; Osama Bin Laden too, but they take the one woman in America willing to cook, clean, and work in the yard, and haul her butt off to jail.”

A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale has hit Mexico.
Two million Mexicans have died and over a million are injured.
The country is totally ruined and the government doesn’t know where to start with asking for help to rebuild.
The rest of the world is in shock.
Canada is sending troopers to help the Mexican army control the riots.
Saudi Arabia is sending oil.
Other Latin American countries are sending supplies.
The European community (except France) is sending food and money.
The United States, not to be outdone, is sending Five million replacement Mexicans.
God Bless America

http://www.local6.com/slideshow/news/3745342/detail.html?qs=;s=13;p=news;dm=ss;w=320;tn=b

Ever wonder if other species that enjoy corroding their lungs with nicotine and tar? Wonder not.

A cowboy was herding his herd in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.

The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, “If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?”

The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, “Sure. Why not?”… (more…)

http://www.backuptrauma.com/video

http://verba.chromogenic.net/archives/2005/01/cameramail.html

Clever idea. Mail a disposable camera across the country. I wonder if anyone has tried to do this across the world?

http://scottrope.typepad.com/scott_rope/2005/02/jack_in_the_box.html

I had posted this prior to the site being hacked and am re-posting for reference purposes only. I was able to also find a Snopes article on the veracity of this audio file. True or not, it’s still one of the most hillarious things I’ve heard in a long time.

If the above link ever goes away, here is the audio file.

And here is the Snopes article on the subject.

http://www.dogjudo.co.uk/

**Caution**

Be within close proximity of a restroom when you go to this site!

Gotta love the ‘Power Dates’.

“…reminds me of clothes my mother used to wear..”.

LOL